Category Archives: Parenting

Time to Stop Blaming Parent for Kids’ Behavior

Research explains what (not who!) is really to blame for challenging behavior. J. Stuart Ablon Ph.D. As a child psychologist, who specializes in helping kids with challenging behavior, I hear how often we parents take the blame for our kids’ behavior, whether the behavior happens at home, at school or anywhere else. I can’t really blame folks

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A Different Take on How to Stop Bullying

Bullying a bully doesn’t work. Here’s what does. Now that bullying prevention programs are required in our schools, students who are the victims of bullying are finally getting the empathy and attention they deserve. The work, however, shouldn’t stop there. Behind most bullying programs is the fundamental assumption that students who bully are choosing to do so in order

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The Best Way to Stay Calm Amid Challenging Behavior

By: Dr. Stuart Ablon, Director of Think:Kids As a psychologist specializing in working with kids and adolescents with very challenging behavior, I spend a lot of time thinking about how to help kids stay “regulated,” which in essence means calm in the midst of frustration or over-excitement. I have the great fortune of doing a

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Why is it so Hard to Change Problem Behavior?

The answer is actually quite simple.  Our understanding of how to change problem behavior comes from our understanding of why the problem behavior exists in the first place. And our explanation for why people behave poorly is typically wrong! When someone doesn’t behave or perform as we would like them to, our default assumption is

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